talk.
by tommy turkish
Summary: rogue and logan talk. post x-men:the movie.


needless to say, the xmen don't belong to me. well, needful really. so i don't get sued..? but yah.  
  
*  
  
  
  
on the front steps of the mansion. framed by the great stone pillars of the school, and the smoke that hovers in the air above them.. around them. she was talking to him for maybe the first time since he'd come back. after so long. and the conversation inevitably came around to this..  
  
"well.. you know. not that it's any consolation.. but.. i think, honestly Logan.. if you had stayed..."  
  
rogue stopped. waited.  
  
"... well, who knows what if you had stayed."  
  
logan looked at her. moonlight washing his face. painting it skeptical.  
  
"you're trying to tell me she wouldn't have married him?"  
  
she looked away. she hadn't wanted to get into this. didn't know what compelled her to .. fuck.  
  
"i'm not trying to tell you anything.."  
  
he looked at her still. at the white lock that made him feel so connected to her. but this wasn't about her. or it might be. but he wasn't at all equipped to start dealing with that.  
  
"marie.."  
  
she turned at the sound of her name. waited. then,  
  
"i thought you weren't good at the heart-to-hearts. you're supposed to hate this bit."  
  
he grinned. exhaled. waited.  
  
she glanced up at the stars. just don't let me betray this.  
  
"shit. she might have.. married him.. anyway. even with you here. she's big on the loyalty thing, jean. honour. but.. you would have made it difficult, i know..  
"she waited for you, too, i think. in her own way. i mean, not.. not so anyone else noticed it.. at least, i don't think. because it's jean.. and .. well, she's pretty contained generally.   
"not like, she was waiting for you to come back so.. like.. she could break it off and you two could ride off into whatever together.. although, shit, maybe it occurred to her..   
"but more like.. she wanted to know that it was okay.."  
  
rogue broke off. forcing herself to keep the cigarette in her hand steady. to exhale the smoke and not keep it locked in her lungs until maybe it sent her unconscious and she could keep from doing this. because it was about jean. but it was about her too. about logan. and loving logan.   
  
"fuck.. i dunno."  
  
she blinked fiercely. just once. it was enough to get rid of the wet in her eyes that threatened. but logan was looking down. at his shoes. at the grounds below. just down. and he didn't see.  
  
"so.. when'd this start? this intuitive reading people thing?"  
  
she shrugged. didn't need the sarcasm, really.  
  
".. and how'd you get so good?"  
  
she shrugged again. smiled a little this time. pointed out,  
  
"i could be completely wrong."  
  
he concurred,  
  
"could be."  
  
and waited.  
  
finally,  
  
"well, i guess you're either a player or you're on the sidelines.. and they don't let life-suckers play.."  
  
he watched her. moonlight danced across dry eyes. they were harder than he remembered.   
  
"... so you're in the audience. you get to watch."  
  
they sat. logan inept at this, the worst part and rogue just.. just.  
  
"so.. look i know you'd sooner kick my ass than let me tell you what to do.. but.."  
  
he was looking at her now. something in his eyes.. she had to look away.  
  
"..they're happy logan. she's happy. and i know you love her. but.. scott's a good guy. and he loves her too. and i guess.. just be sure you love her more than he does before you turn her life upside down.  
".. she's.. she took care of me. after you left.. and i just don't want her to get hurt."  
  
quiet. she knew she'd gone too far. but she'd been prepared to do that. so she waited.  
  
"you think i'd hurt her?"  
  
she thought about it. ran it around between her ears.  
  
"not intentionally.."  
  
"..unintentionally then?"  
  
"maybe."  
  
"marie. enlighten me."  
  
"scott is WITH her, logan. every minute of every day. even when he's not around. that's the nature of his love."  
  
"..and the nature of mine?"  
  
she shrugged.  
  
"who knows?"  
  
they sat. rogue put out her cigarette.  
  
"so you don't think i should get a chance to find out?"  
  
she sighed.  
  
"i just don't know if experimentation is generally a good idea with a married woman. with that married woman anyway.."  
  
finally she got up.  
  
"bottom line, though. i can't tell you how to feel. and i don't know how you feel.. but i owe her so much.."  
  
her voice broke here softly. the only time. her defences sliding a little now that the end was so near. logan looked up, a little startled maybe.  
  
"i just had to put something out there."  
  
he looked at her. hard. nodded his understanding.  
  
and she left.  
  
  
logan sat, thinking. mulling it over before crushing the cigar underfoot and following her inside.  
  
he'd given her enough time to get to her room, he figured. not really wanting to see her now. not willing to admit that she was right. that in her stunted, broken way, she'd made sense. he hated her a little for it.  
  
wasn't prepared, at any rate, to see her standing at the stairs, with bobby. to hear them arguing.  
  
he moved into a room on his left, knowing in their adolescent anger they hadn't seen him. he grinned in the dark, wondering what new imagined slight had started this one. teenagers.  
  
rogue's voice was the first to register. angry.  
  
"oh please tell me you did not stand there and listen to the whole conversation. please tell me you're not as pathetic as all that."  
  
"i heard enough."  
  
"and what did you hear, bobby?"  
  
"i heard you warning him off jean. as though it was in her best interest and his. as though it had nothing whatsoever to do with you. and what you still feel after the three fucking years he left you here with nothing."  
  
"just what the fuck are you trying to say? it's three o'clock in the morning, bobby, i don't have time for this implication shit."  
  
"three o'clock in the morning nothing. you know exactly what i'm trying to say."  
  
she looked at him long and hard. finally,  
  
"okay. alright.. i wasn't looking out for jean. i don't really owe her the world because she was the only person to actually, really talk to me after logan left. no, that's just a front. and it's not like logan saved my life three fuckin' times either. so when i pretend to care about him, to not want him tangled up in shit that'll probably bring down the entire x-team, not to mention a marriage, i'm doing just that. PRETENDING.   
"because, really, and this IS what you're waiting to hear, bobby, isn't it? REALLY, it's all just part of the master plan to get him into my bed where we can proceed to make mad love, because, i can, after all, TOUCH PEOPLE."  
  
he wasn't looking at her anymore. he couldn't. he felt her eyes. leaking tears, looking at him with so much.. hurt and disgust.. and anger. he couldn't move. his apology stuck in his throat.  
  
brushing away the tears, she turned and climbed the stairs to her room.  
  
leaving bobby, looking after her.. longing and regretful. and logan, in the dark. stunned. 


End file.
